Clinical Hypnotherapy and its applications in life

August 7, 2007 at 12:08 pm (Parts conflict, family, relationships, the Secret)

how is it, when I mention I am a hypnotherapist, people get paranoid? is everyone really that poor of self esteem that they think that I could be bothered delving into their lives without their permission or request?

I am not usually interested in the deep psyke of others unless I have to deal with them in a meaninful way, the FEAR that I have seen my profession evoke in people is truely amazing, I have been accused of analysing people when I ask a simple question to a friend just because I want to know, not as an analytical tool.

And yes, I realise that this is because they are reacting to a gestalt and it is not what I said, it is still confronting when a simple comment can lead to hysterics and tears.

clearly the counselling they are already receiving (for the last 5 years) is not working or is moving way too slow, people heal much more quickly than you realise, the power of controlling your mind and feeding the good focus in convincing your subconscious that it is indeed ok and a comment can be made without it relating directly to you and that you make youself feel bad because of that comment.

ok, off my chest now

good thing that no one reads this blog, I get to vent and therefore have a discussion with all the different parts of my psyke.

be well and chill out every one

Hugs

Mel

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So Oprah just did “The Secret” on Australian TV

May 17, 2007 at 2:53 pm (command, family, relationships, the Secret)

The Amazing thing about the secret is that is isn’t people have been talking about it for centuries

Hold a memory of a person for long enough and they will contact you (yes, even if it is a dream then it is contact)

we ask for things all the time without actually realising that we do

saying “its awful” over and over again really compounds the fact that what is in that world is and will remain, believing and looking forward for things to change and working on a future.. that gives both you and the universe something to aim for.

Because as soon as you mention that you want “that”, then suddenly you may begin to see many other people whom already have “that” and when you associate or relate to those people you will find out how to get “that”, it is a snowball effect that just keeps going.

Be grateful for what you have… I have a beautiful husband and gorgeous children, and the more I get to know them the luckier I feel… even in the challenging times – and there are many in life, I am lucky because there is always hope and everything eventually passes both good and bad… when you focus on the good bits then the bad falls away, shrivels and drops off like it is supposed to…. gain learning from every challenge… look at it and say thankyou for being here, what do I need to learn?

Learn to say “thankyou for giving me this” say it to yourself, others and the universe

and watch with child like wonder as your life changes for the better little by little and you notice it.

law of compounding says that a little movement now can make a huge difference in the future, just one little baby step of self appreciation and love and off you go on the best Alice in wonderland ride ever!!

Be well and happy

Mel

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love a little more…. live a little longer

May 3, 2007 at 11:42 am (command, hypnosis, relationships)

its just that simple

Mel

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Positive sayings and command language

March 27, 2007 at 10:38 pm (command, family, hypnosis, relationships)

I like how your hair shines in this light, instead of I like your hair

That dress moves so beautifully on you instead of I like your dress

Round out the compliment with How it is good and Exactly what is good – nice about them and then they have less chance to yes..but you.

“How good to you feel” is a tag question that lets people know that they can feel good

And you may notice how easily and naturally these roll off the tongue when we use the positive command eg

Yesterday was really bad.. you know?I stuffed up and it was just awful

or

Yesterday was really not good, you know?I made huge mistakes and I learned a lot!

Effectively both are the same sentence and you may notice now just how much more optimistic the second sentence is….. when we accept the way things were and look forward we give ourselves and others permission to learn from the experience and put the effort of focus into a better outcome in the future.

The command language in each sentance has an enormous effect on our bodies and minds and as a therapist I cut people off as quickly (and gently) as I can so that we can steer them to a better plane, whilst honoring the intention of the client to get across that yesterday was not good (command word = good)

When someone asks “how are you?”…. say “fantastic” and light up with a big smile, and notice their bodies standing more upright as you say it, copying yours and as you take a nice deep breath of optimism, you can also notice that theirs will match yours and they automatically look like they feel better (the secret is that they do now too!!, just for a moment, and that makes a huge difference when you realise that we touch so many lives for a fraction of a second every day and can make their life so much happier with a little frivolous joy ;-)

Practice it, have a go!!.. its fun and contagious

Mel

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… and his autoimmune system is now attacking itself

March 22, 2007 at 10:57 am (Parts conflict, command, hormones, hypnosis, relationships, separated)

I know of a couple who have split up for two years now and the guy has been dragging his feet with settlement, so much so that he is now in contempt of court.. it means more to him to piss off his ex than to just get it over with.

Sadly, they have a child and the many issues that go along with that.

(back story)

for the last 5 years, he has been predicting his own death, this is one of the reasons that his wife left him because he took her on his roller coaster of emotions every day and she could not cope any more and left him.  He is morbidly obese and though in the last 2 years shed 75kg+ he is still a big boy.

Last week, I have been told that he was due in court in three weeks time and he  will not do anything about it, the guy is a friend so all I can do is be there if he needs to chat.

On Monday I find out that he is now in hospital in ICU on a respirator with secondary pneumonia and his own immune system is attacking his lungs , he had been coughing up blood…. talk about a parts conflict.

For as long as I have known them, he has been generally unhappy, and from what his ex wife says, he was always saying he was going to die around his birthday, this has been going on for years because she would call me crying from time to time and say she could not help him want to live, he did not want to get off the couch and look at alternatives, he just kept saying that he would die and it would be soon….   he turns 35 in may

Simply put,  be careful what you say because the subconscious mind is always aware and gives you exactly what you want, given that once she had left him he then went out and shed so much weight, if he turned his thinking to I want to live.. then perhaps this would have been different, he still can pull through, he just needs to want it enough, however in his language now saying “I don’t want to die” Still carries the command ‘to die’, the subconscious can (and does depending on the depth of importance) ignore the ‘don’t’.

Think for a positive outcome and say it 10 times in the morning and 10 times at night

Emile coue coined the phrase

“every day and in every way I am becoming better and better and better”

I give this to my clients to say and because it is open ended for the better, then the subconscious takes this on easily and naturally and changes things in just the right time for you.

Be well

Mel

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Grandfriends day

March 12, 2007 at 2:34 pm (family, kids, relationships, separated)

Today is Grandfriends day, part of seniors week in NSW, Australia

Dreamer and Amazon’s School has a big celebration and we got to experience all the fun of being a family (Matts mum came, his dad was a little busy, sadly mine died when I was 9 so no grandparents from my side).

Anyway, it was a little sad to see separated families all vying for the little ones attention and barely concealing their anger at the “opposing side”,  I wonder what is needed for a truce to be called at these things, the pull on the children has massive implications so early in their development

Mel

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How constructive is praise for your child? and what do you praise?

March 1, 2007 at 10:24 am (command, family, kids, relationships)

http://nymag.com/news/features/27840/

This is a very interesting take on language, and inherently I knew this before I read it – subconsciously, now I know it consciously and have found a change with dreamer and amazon within a couple of days because of my change in the positive reinforcement language I use with them.

Live and learn every day!

When you praise the effort, the kids work harder, when you praise the intelligence, they need to protect their ’status’ as being sooooo smart so they only do what they know they can do easily and if anything is hard, they stop very quickly because this tells them that they are not that smart….

Gotta love the human mind.

Hugs

Meli

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A Frightening development in marketing – Hypnomarketing

March 1, 2007 at 12:18 am (command, fertility, hypnosis, relationships)

I believe that this is not only detrimental to the Hypnotherapy industry, it is also dangerous for the poor suckers who walk into this honey pot.

http://hypnomarketing.biz/

My husband just got an invitation to go to a hypnoshow free, with free alcohol and nibblies.

As I am a clinical hypnotherapist I thought cool, a show is always fun to watch… upon reading I am APPALLED that this is going to happen. they are charging the client $20K to $100K (client is trendy clothing company)

And inviting the young trendy an uninformed to come for a free show… .hell I would go too!!

The thing that buggs me is that they are so up front that they are promoting a clothing line, ideally this would be ok however, knowing that the subconscious mind does not know the difference between reality and imagination, I am EXTREMELY concerned because they are directly linking these clothes with feeling great and sexual potency and such things (as all good advertising does), however, putting these people even though they are willing into a trance and linking the clothes with actual wellbeing is a dangerous road to take in my opinion

Therapists Know that 20% of people are HIGHLY SUGGESTIBLE and with a few drinks, this percentage only increases.

Subconsciously when you walk onto stage, you are giving deep approval for what is to occur and if that is being in a show great, if that is being made a slave to a brand for life and it is directly attached to sexual potency, wellbeing and a happier life, that is irresponsible, especially given the people coming think that they a going to get something free, a skillfully (and I know the hypnotist, he is EXTREMELY good, his use of command, embedded and metaphorical are fantastic, he was an NLP trainer) worded patter can really make an impact – great for advertising… not so good for the simply uninformed…

Yes they are adults, yes they walk in (and have to sign waivers!!) It just feels wrong, in my map of the world..

advertising is the are of co-ercion true.

Moving people into a highly suggestible state even with their agreement and promoting to them as such linking it explicitly to their health and wellbeing? what happens when the brand folds? or does not come in their size? HOW WILL THE SUBCONSCIOUS REACT WHEN THESE THINGS THAT ARE NOW SO NECESSARY FOR SELF ESTEEM ARE NOT AVALIABLE?

Impotence? heart disease? relationship troubles? cancer?

what do you think? will this send our Industry back onto the stage and out of actually helping people? what will the push back be?

Mel

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Lack of organisation on my behalf

February 27, 2007 at 4:42 pm (family, hypnosis, kids, relationships)

So, things are getting a little frazzled at the moment, I had not been as attentive for my family as I could have been and am now reaping the rewards… Dreamer is off in dreamland again and Amazon is “moody” so back to mumming, I have been on a 2 week INTENSIVE course for Hypnotherapy, I am 3/4 through getting my Diploma of Clinical Hypnotherapy and just need to get a few assignments in so on the downward hill run, I am excited that my client bast is growing and I can see many more clients on the near horizon so the worst is over and now our family can begin to naturally heal and work towards …… da da daaaaa WORLD DOMINATION!!

how is your week going?

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Listen like a man

February 27, 2007 at 1:39 pm (command, family, kids, relationships)

Strange that men and women actually listen differently (yes, this is a gross generalisation)

Women tend to listen and give mild opinions and let the talker just vent

Men listen and have a need to give the talker solutions and are surprised when those solutions are not followed through

as a therapist I need to listen like a woman and a man…. only reacting to the things that the client actually needs to work on and ignore the rest of the fluff.

I am still working on it

watcha think? is it easy to adjust one’s listening style?

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